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PHUN
STUFF
  + Phood?

~ Russ's Phun Stuff ~

Pay The Band
Blues One Two Three by Chris Rywalt Click here for music-joke-o-the-month The dog has you covered...
Click for Funky Dog Show
For some interesting
THINGS To PONDER

Some interesting thoughts to ponder ...

Play TWANG THE DANG...
Click here: Click here to play Twang The Dang then click on the larger image...

About Feeling Good...

Famous People Painting

Some writing by my friend, Linda Thorn.
Click here for Linda Thorn's new book


akinator (6K) Choose a famous person in your mind and then participate in this 20 question game!! It really works: akinator

The Little Red Boxes game...
A group of numerals from 1 to 33 will appear in red boxes. You don't need to click on the numbers, just move your cursor over them in order from 1 to 33 and as you correctly do so that numeral will disappear. See how fast you can get the task completed. This is a good practice to keep your brain sharp and your eye hand co-ordination crisp, or it could drive you mad.
http://www.chezmaya.com/jeux/game33.htm

Count the number of
people in this picture.
Keep watching...
After it changes,
count them again.
Hmmm...
What happened??
How many people?

How was the world on the Year of your birth?
To find out, click here: Year of your birth
Enter your birth year, click on the question mark (?), then sit back and enjoy!

Click here to see The Human Clock <--- Click here to see The Human Clock
This is quite clever and it does actually work with the correct time, in both Analog and Digital formats! When it appears, click anywhere in the clock and it becomes Digital; another click and it returns to Analog.
  • Who ya gonna call?...
  • IKEA Job Interview -->
  • Make a chair and take a seat

  • A Worldly Cow -->
  • Check this out

    If you want to explore some interesting things: Linky & Dinky
    - Be prepared to surf a while

    Fun With Flash

    Sheepish Reaction Test

    Sax-guy
    saxWoman.jpg (5K) or girl?
    Some favorite Personalities...
    Gil Grissom Judge Judy Joaquin Phoenix

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    Musician's Jokes:

    Q: How do you know there is a chick singer at the from door?
    A:   She can't find the right key

    Q: How do you know when there's a drummer at the front door?
    A:   The knocking speeds up.

    Q: What do you call a guitar player without a girl friend?
    A:   Homeless

    You know you're too old to play gigs when...

  • All your fans leave by 9:30 p.m.
  • You can sing along with most of your playlist on the elevator.
  • Instead of a fifth member, your band wants to spring for a roadie.
  • You lost the directions to the gig.
  • You feel like hell before the gig even starts.
  • You find your drink tokens from last month's gig in your guitar case.
  • You refuse to play without earplugs.
  • You ask the club owner if you can start at 8:30 instead of 9:30.
  • You need a nap before the gig.
  • After the third set, you bug the club owner to let you quit early.
  • During the breaks, you now go to the van to lie down.
  • You don't recover until Tuesday afternoon.
  • You hope the host's speech lasts forever.
  • You buy amps considering their weight and not their tone or cool factor.
  • You can remember seven different club names for the same location.
  • You have a hazy memory of when you could work 10 gigs in 7 days.

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    Computers have changed our lives forever...

    Blondie
    Smart Phishing

    What's a record needle?

    Dagwood Out Of The Loop

    Daddy's Home
    Shell Phone



  • Ordering a pizza in 2010
















  • Before there were computers...
    Memory was something you lost with age
    An Application was for employment
    A Program was a TV show
    A Cursor used profanity
    A keyboard was a piano
    A web was a spider's home
    A virus was the flu
    A hard drive was a long trip on the road
    A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
    And if you had a 3 inch floppy . . .
    you just hoped nobody ever found out!



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    Short and sweet...

    AUTO REPAIR
    A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it's idling smoothly.
    She says, "What's the story?"
    He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor."
    She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

    THE VACUUM
    A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"



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    You know you're too old to play gigs when...

    1. It becomes more important to find a place on stage for your fan than your amp.
    2. Your gig clothes make you look like George Burns out for a round of golf.
    3. All your fans leave by 9:30 p.m.
    4. All you want from groupies is a foot massage and back rub.
    5. You love taking the elevator because you can sing along with most of your play list.
    6. Instead of a fifth member, your band wants to spring for a roadie.
    7. You lost the directions to the gig.
    8. You need your glasses to see the amp settings.
    9. You've thrown out your back jumping off the stage.
    10. You feel like hell before the gig even starts.
    11. The waitress is your daughter.
    12. You stop the set because your ibuprofen fell behind the speakers.
    13. Most of your crowd just sways in their seats.
    14. You find your drink tokens from last month's gig in your guitar case.
    15. You refuse to play without earplugs.
    16. You ask the club owner if you can start at 8:30 instead of 9:30.
    17. You check the TV schedule before booking a gig.
    18. Your gig stool has a back.
    19. You're related to at least one member in the band.
    20. You don't let any one sit in.
    21. You need a nap before the gig.
    22. After the third set, you bug the club owner to let you quit early.
    23. During the breaks, you now go to the van to lay down.
    24. You prefer a music stand with a light.
    25. You don't recover until Tuesday afternoon.
    26. You hope the host's speech lasts forever.
    27. You buy amps considering their weight and not their tone or cool factor.
    29. You can remember seven different club names for the same location.
    29. The set lists are now 1 set per page, landscape format and VERY LARGE FONTS!
    30. Your vintage gear from the 60s you bought new.




    judy6 (33K)

    Judge to a prostitute: 'So when did you realize you were raped?'
    Prostitute, wiping away tears: 'When the check bounced'


    These are things people actually said in court (not Judy's)
    ... taken down, word for word, and now published by court reporters.

    _________________________________________
    Judge: "Well, Sir, I have reviewed this case and I've decided to give your wife $775 a week."
    Husband: "That's fair, your honor. I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."
    ________________________________________
    Q: What is your date of birth?
    A: July fifteenth.
    Q: What year?
    A: Every year
    _________________________________________
    Q: What gear were you in at moment of the impact?
    A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
    _________________________________________
    Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
    A: Yes.
    Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
    A: I forget.
    Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something you've forgotten?
    _________________________________________
    Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
    A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
    Q: How long has he lived with you?
    A: Forty-five years.
    _________________________________________
    Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
    A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
    Q: And why did that upset you?
    A: My name is Susan.
    _________________________________________
    Q: And where was the location of the accident?
    A: Approximately milepost 499.
    Q: And where is milepost 499?
    A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
    _________________________________________
    Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
    A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
    _________________________________________
    Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
    A: Yes.
    Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
    A: Yes, sir.
    Q: What did she say?
    A: What disco am I at?
    _________________________________________
    Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
    A: Would you repeat that question, please?
    _________________________________________
    Q: The youngest son, the 20-year old, how old is he?
    _________________________________________
    Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
    _________________________________________
    Q: So the date of conception of (the baby) was August 8th?
    A: Yes.
    Q: And what were you doing at that time?
    A: I resent that question.
    _________________________________________
    Q: She had three children, right?
    A: Yes.
    Q: How many were boys?
    A: None.
    Q: Were there any girls?
    _________________________________________
    Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
    A: By death.
    Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
    _________________________________________
    Q: Can you describe the individual?
    A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
    Q: Was this a male or a female?
    _________________________________________
    Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition that I sent to your attorney?
    A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
    _________________________________________
    Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
    A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
    _________________________________________
    Q: All your responses must be oral, OK?
    A: OK.
    Q: What school did you go to?
    A: Oral.
    _________________________________________
    Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
    A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
    Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
    A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.
    _________________________________________
    Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
    _________________________________________
    Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for pulse?
    A: No.
    Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
    A: No.
    Q: Did you check for breathing?
    A: No.
    Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
    A: No.
    Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
    A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
    Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
    A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

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    And now for a little bit of "blue" humour... To BLUE ROOM
    Click elevator to enter "The Blue Room", if you must.


       © Russ Strathdee Last updated: